Taylor Swift Gets Candid About Turning 30 in 2019: 'Part of Me Still Feels 18'

Taylor Swift‘s 30th birthday is still months away, but the “Blank Space” singer is already prepping for the milestone.

On Tuesday, Swift — who’s birthday is on Dec. 13 — opened up about hitting the big 3-0 in an introspective post on Instagram, part of her new Elle magazine cover. And though she’ll now be a thirtysomething, it’s clear that number doesn’t mean much to Swift just yet.

“According to my birth certificate, I turn 30 this year,” Swift wrote, captioning a photo of her on Elle. “It’s weird because part of me still feels 18 and part of me feels 283, but the actual, factual age I currently am is 29.”

“I’ve heard people say that your 30s are ‘the most fun!’ so I’ll definitely keep you posted on my findings on that when I know,” she added. “But until then, I thought I’d share some lessons I’ve learned before reaching 30 with @elleusa, because it’s 2019 and sharing is caring.”

Those same words led Swift’s Elle interview, which dropped on Wednesday. In the piece, Swift shared her wisdom on 30 different topics, including her mom’s cancer battle, her fear of performing after the Manchester bombing and Vegas shooting, and her body insecurity issues.

Meanwhile, that’s not the only recent piece for the media brand Swift penned.

The Grammy winner also wrote an essay for Elle UK‘s April issue, as part of her cover shoot for the magazine. Titled “The Power of Pop,” the piece has Swift writing about “songwriting, what musically moves us and why, and the melodies that define our memories.”

“My favorite kinds of books to read are the ones that do more than just tell you a story,” she said in the piece. “The writing I love the most places you into that story, that room, that rain soaked kiss. You can smell the air, hear the sounds, and feel your heart race as the character’s does.”

Admitting that she is “highly biased,” Swift goes on to write that she believes the way that music can take a person back to a long-forgotten memory is the “closest sensation we have to traveling in time.”

“To this day, when I hear ‘Cowboy Take Me Away’ by the Dixie Chicks, I instantly recall the feeling of being 12 years old, sitting in a little wood-paneled room in my family home in Pennsylvania,” Swift explained. “When I hear ‘I Write Sins Not Tragedies’ by Panic! At The Disco by Panic! at the Disco … ‘How to Save a Life‘ by The Fray, ‘Breathe (2AM)‘ by Anna Nalick or ‘The Story‘ by Brandi Carlile, I immediately flash back to being 17 and on tour for months on end. I would spend my rare nights off painting alone with candles lit in my room — just being alone with those songs (Those are all from the Grey’s Anatomy soundtrack. My commitment to that show truly knows no bounds).”

While Swift is currently in a happy relationship with actor Joe Alywn, she also revealed in the essay the precise songs that have gotten her through past heartbreak. “I’m convinced that ‘You Learn‘ by Alanis Morissette, ‘Put Your Records On‘ by Corinne Bailey Rae and ‘Why’ by Annie Lennox have actually healed my heart after bad breakups or let downs,” she said.

It’s the way those songwriters poured their own memories into their music that Swift truly admires, and hopes to do with her own songs.

“I like to be able to remember the extremely good and extremely bad times,” she confessed. “I want to remember the color of the sweater, the temperature of the air, the creak of the floorboards, the time on the clock when your heart was stolen or shattered or healed or claimed forever.”

Swift — who will appear in the upcoming film adaption of Cats — has been causing a stir recently among her fans, who have been have been running wild with theories that she is gearing up to release new music.

Just last week, Swift responded to the Swifties on Instagram by posting a photo of her beloved cat Olivia making a shocked face.

“She just read all the theories,” Swift teased.